The Loss of a Great Friend and Loved One

The 15^th of March 2010

 

THE LOSS OF A GREAT FRIEND AND LOVED ONE

MURPHY DOBSON-SMITH

04/23/1996 – 03/15/2010

 

 

Hind sight is always far more clear than it was during the moment and as the old saying goes, it is always 20/20 vision. Looking back on the day that Murphy joined my life seems to be crystal clear, except for knowing who chose whom.

 

The person I was dating during that point in my life brought up that he wanted a dog. I traveled for work, mostly regionally, but a dog was taking on a great deal of responsibility. I had entertained the thought numerous times prior to the request, but felt my time away would be unfair to the dog and I wasn't absolutely sure I could take care of another being. Hell, at times I wasn't sure I was taking such wonderful care of myself, so how was I be responsible for a dog?

 

 

I was in between both sides of this argument, but I had agreed to a dog. After playing the nagging mother over what taking care of a dog would mean, I acquiesced and we were in search of a companion. We had discussed a Chocolate Lab, Black Lab or something of that kind and he scoured the local papers every weekend until he found a female black lab at the Boston Animal Rescue Center on Tremont waiting for adoption. We rushed from Dorchester, (the southern and largest part of Boston City) to the Southend of Boston in hopes to find a beautiful black lady waiting to come home with us, but a family had just adopted her. We walked around looking inside the cages at the other dogs and cats that were posing, barking, giving their best "take me home" looks and then there was Murphy.

 

She sat in an oversized cage shivering as she looked up at me with those beautiful brown eyes. I was standing in front of her cage when I kept hearing my name excitedly from two gates up from me where a 350 pound Rottweiler sat. He was handsome and in a seated position he came up to almost my shoulders. He was a miniature horse and my boyfriend was all about the Rottie. I kept telling him "No……we can't!!!! He won't fit in the apartment! We would have to get rid of the sofa…..hell we'd have to get rid of all the furniture just for him to move around the apartment and my place was huge." I motioned for my boyfriend to come down the two gates and look at the beautiful rust colored lady that was quiet and just looking for someone to notice her as she shivered.

We stood in front of the cage that held Murphy and even though there were signs telling me, "Do Not Open the Cages without Supervision," I was compelled to sit with her. I didn't know if she would charge out like the little ball that shattered all the glass in the movie, The Men in Black, I opened the cage to let her come out to me. She very gently and with such grace stepped up to me as I sat with my legs crossed in the middle of the concrete floor. This tender lady stepped into my lap and circled it once as she lay on top of my legs right there on the floor. I was amazed by her and just as I was moving my gaze from her to Paul and back to her; she lifted her head and licked my left cheek and then curled into a tight ball and fell asleep on my lap. I could do little more than stroke her soft fur as I felt her heart beating against my leg.

 

 

I was hooked, but I still had my doubts about the youthfulness of my companion or my ability to care for her myself. I suggested that we walk around the corner on Tremont Street to a New York style pizza place and grab a couple slices while we discussed this further.

 

I couldn't get this sense out of my mind that somehow this dog already knew me and that we were supposed to be together…or something. We ate and we agreed to get her so we made our way back to the animal shelter. We brought her out of the cage, this time with supervisory assistance, and I was in the process of paying the fees while my partner played with her on the floor. I asked, "What do we call her?" With very little hesitation and with confidence, he said, "Murphy!" I turned from the lady behind the counter and watched the two of them playing and somehow it fit her. In this odd, Murphy Brown sort of way, I already knew this little girl had character to her and the name just fit. So Murphy became a part of the family that day.

We were told that she had been abandoned on the streets of Boston and that we would have to teach her that we were not abandoning her. The lady behind the counter was joined by a large man and a smaller framed man both with smiles across their faces. The lady proceeded to tell me that a little girl used to leave food for her in one of the small neighborhood parks and Murphy would come by every day, jump the fence to get into the park and eat the food. The larger guy said he tried to catch her several times by himself, but she was too fast and agile for one person. He tried nets and the bar, but she wouldn't let him get close to her, she was gone each and every time. That is how they knew she had been abandoned for two months, because they were trying to catch her for that long. I had to laugh at the imagining this big guy and several other similar sized dog catchers trying to corner this beautiful little girl and she would out maneuver them. They laughed as they told how it took three nets and five guys to finally trap her and bring her in. I would have paid money to watch them trying to corner her and not lay a finger on her.

Several days later we were able to bring Murphy home. I had purchased a crate (which my roommate affectionately named the HOUSIE). I had food, dishes, collar, leash; treats, toys and everything else we would need to spoil her rotten. We got her home and I had the bright ideal to start teaching her we would always come back and to start eliminating any separation anxieties she might have. I had a large fence enclosed back yard that was about four foot tall so we closed her into the back yard and was walking up the side of the house when I hear a clag from the gate. As I turn expecting to see Murphy standing against the gate but inside the fence, there she was walking beside me looking up while I was looking down. Hhuummm….I thought I was smarter than she was and kidded myself into thinking I was Alpha-Dog, so I attached the leash to the collar and we went to the opposite side of the yard from the gate and I tied her to the pole of the fence. I was walking back to the gate with a smile on my face thinking, let's see her get out of that and before I knew it; the clag of the gate was her swooshing over it like a gazelle as she again was looking up at me with wonderment. Damn dog bit through an expensive rope leash in a blink of an eye and she barely even touched the top of the gate as she jumped over it with grace like it was nothing! This should have been the point I knew she was the right dog for me, because only a smartass dog could train the master as she so affectionately did over the next several years.

It didn't take long before we figured out that Murphy had been abused as a puppy. We didn't really know how old she was, but they estimated her age between twelve and eighteen months. We would wrestle on the ground and I would be on my hands and knees as she would go around me and over me and wiggle out from under me like Houdini. The best was the first time we were playing and she was behind me and suddenly I felt front two paws and instantly two back paws while she jumped over me and then whip around and crouch down just like me as she faced me waging that tail. She was so fast and agile that I could see why it took three nets and five dog catchers to trap little girl…she was an escape artist. She had been with us several months and we were playing when suddenly my hands were in a position that must have been like another man striking her and she just cowered, shivered and curled into a tight little ball and then inside her crate she remained.

 

I was struck by what had just happened and it went by so quickly that it took me a few minutes to figure out what was happening with her. It took me over an hour to get her back out of her crate and from then on she and I had something big in common with each other. I understood something about her that few people can truly acknowledge and it broke my heart to think that some guy beat this precious little dog. She was so affectionate and loving and the one who fell the hardest was my roommate. Jamie said in advance of us getting a dog that he would have nothing to do with her. I understood his concerns, but she had him wrapped around her little paws within two months. She would sleep that first six months or close to a year in the kitchen in her crate and when my roommate got home from work or the clubs, he would let her out. Before long a routine immerged where Jamie would let her out and make himself a little snack (in his words….a little snackie). He would fall asleep in his bedroom or on the sofa with leftover food and Murphy would clean up his messes…along with the dishes. Later when she would sleep in a bed in my bedroom, my roommate would come get her out and she would scamper out behind him knowing this was the 2 AM feeding time. My roommate was the only person who Murphy would allow to bear hug her and he would fall asleep doing it. I would get up in the morning only to find Murphy under the covers in his bed with him, but in this tight bear hug that he would have her in all night long. I would stand at the door and try not to laugh as I watched her wiggle her way out of his grip without waking him.

I've seen this dog do some of the most amazing things that I've ever seen any dog do. She pivoted herself and a puppy around her keeping herself between the puppy and a larger dog that she obviously felt was not good for the puppy. I watched as she protected an infant baby from a man that she absolutely did not like as he started getting to what she thought was too close. I watched her jump between me and someone who was bent on doing me harm. And most moving of all were the years that I drowned myself in depression and sorrow, she would come over to me and lay with her head on my lap as I cried myself too many lost days and nights after the loss of a relationship. Murphy wasn't just a pet; she was an extension of who I am as a person. Friends use to tell me that they knew my mood based on how Murphy. There was never a friend as great as Murphy was too me. She knew everything there was to know about me. She covered up the skeletons when I didn't want them displayed…and when it was time to write my troubles away, she drug the damn things out of the closet too. She was the greatest joy always to be around and it was funny, but when I would be working non-stop, she would come over and curl her paw around my arm or hands as she would somehow pull m from the keyboard and the computer….I mean literally dragging me away. As fast as squirrels are, she caught two, not to mention that when we lived in Boston, she killed at least one skunk every fall. The most she killed was three, but the worst was at my going away party in Boston with about a hundred guests still in the house. She was my joy for so many years, my confidant when I didn't have any others, my friend and my heartbeat.

The highest praise I can lay at her paws is that she was diagnosed with a very pronounced heart murmur and congestive heart failure in November of 2007. The veterinarian wanted me to put her down right then, but she was always like the energizer bunny and filled with energy and still kicking Jake's (the other dog in our family) butt when he got out of line….which is often. I couldn't put her down then and am so glad I didn't listen to him. She would play with Jake every day and run all over the yard and yes, when it rained or she wasn't feeling her bouncy self, she would cough from the fluids that were building in her lungs. I've struggled since her prognoses, would I know when the right time would be. She kept giving Jakie hell, so I kept figuring it wasn't now. I only hope and pray I didn't wait too long and equally that I didn't take her from this world too soon. She personified UNCONDITIONAL LOVE and gave it to me every day. I took her for her last car ride today and while her tail was not wagging as usual, it wasn't curled under her like it has been the many months close by.

Murphy, I was graced with such beauty in your company and I can only thank God for you in my life! When the tears dry, I'm sure I will long for your embrace in another time and place. With all my heart, I LOVE YOU!

 

Your humbled servant – Todd M Dobson