Hate is not a Family Value

Hate is not a Family Value

Hate is not a family value, so why is it that family is usually the first to let hate drip from their lips like a rabid dog frothing at the mouth? I don’t understand how a mother can give birth to a little baby, share in its first breath and later kick that same child out of their home when the child acknowledges their own natural sexuality?

Hate drives our gay youth from their warm homes for no other reason than loathing and selfishness of the parents who toss their own flesh and blood into the cold nights with no care for where they go, how they survive or even if they survive. These same parents go to churches on Sunday and call themselves the faithful. They stand at the pulpits and espouse fire and brimstone from a book they hold dearer to them than that flesh and blood that was ostracized because he/she dared to love someone of the same sex. However, the faithful are the truest meaning behind the devastation of Sodom and Gomorrah as read in that very book they cleave to their bosoms. Our gay and lesbian youth run for their lives crying themselves to sleep under the cold night sky wondering if tomorrow brings them another meal. Americans wonder where the scourge on our streets come from, yet they are the ones sending us their children driven from their homes for little reason other than the child was courageous enough to show love for another human being.

We gay and lesbians are accused of being the heartless ones. We are denounced by the faithful stereo typed as immoral and only wanting drugs and sex. The parents who send us their very own are the same ones yelling at our events and stirring congregations with hatred and venom. But we are the ones looked down upon and judged harshly. We are the ones sharing love and looking for those throwaway children that were denied entry into the only homes they ever knew. We are the ones denied rights, privileges and most importantly the love of the only people that truly mattered to us - our own parents.

What has riled me so was the receipt of an IM session from someone on MySpace. He tried to email me several times, but I spurned his advances because they were sexually charged states and his profile said he is fifteen years old. He claimed to be nineteen, but it really doesn’t matter because there is nothing he could say that would have led us in the direction he originally sought. His sexual drive was misguided and after a couple of comments, I recognized the agony he was in as if my past came to visit on the words from his keyboard.

Over an hour and a half we chatted as I discovered that he was kicked out by the vary mother who bore him. She denied her flesh and blood that passed through her womb the warmth and nurturing home because at fifteen years old, she found him in the arms of another male friend. He claims to have graduated High School through the charity of others in his community and has been working to support himself since the night his mother made him mature beyond his years. Even though he’s been on his own for several years, there is no stability in his life and he is desperate to feel the love and affection he once received from the people he knew as family. But the only way he can feel the warmth of that love, is to renounce his disgusting homosexuality by which he knows is defying the natural tendencies that defines him as a man. Can someone please explain to me how this exemplifies the love between a mother and her child? Help me to understand how a mother will allow the destruction of a child’s family without any care for the other siblings involved.

My heart went out to this kid who just wants to feel the loving arms of the same person he called Mom. She was the one who conceived a child giving it love and originally not expecting anything in return. I wanted him to call me or let me call him, but he ended our chat session saying he was going to call his mother and plead with her to take him back.

It is not my place to tell him he is gay when the only sexual encounter that never really happened was interrupted by his mother. He has no clue if he likes men or women and is scared to try either. His inclination that one time was to test the waters with another male friend, but he is too scared to even contemplate his sexuality based on the results of his that first encounter. The lady with whom he trusted to be rational, loving and companionate has him questioning the very foundations of everything he thought he knew as well as his very existence. I understand why the question of his sexuality is so prevalent to him, but only he can find the right answers. Neither his mother nor I can answer the question as to what am I? If he is heterosexual, that is great and I wish him the best. If he is gay, I fear for him because of the confusion and indoctrination delivered by the lips of one that he loves and trust - his mother.

My heart broke last night as he closed our chat session because there is nothing I wouldn’t do to help him come to terms with himself. Why does love come with so many strings attached? When will humanity learn that love makes the waters flow, the sky blue, the sun yellow, the birds chirp, the grass green and your heart beat? Love is what we need to share and hate has no place in our lives. Shame on this kid’s mother, for not getting to know her own son at a time when she could really be a positive influence, instead she would rather practice HATE before she shows him true unconditional love. It obviously means more to her to be in good with her church then it is to love her son.

We must stop the hate; love and accept those around us to make this world a better place for all!